I've never been a huge fan of trips to any DMV in Alabama; I'm sure that sentence could very well have just ended with DMV. With that said, I had the recent pleasure of a number of trips to a couple of them in Mobile, AL. Six trips in fact.
Trip one: Wed 5/30- I had needed to make a trip to a DMV to take the test for the Motorcycle provision on my drivers license. Jillian and I have planned to rent a CanAm Spyder during our vacation next month in Gatlinburg TN. I thought that with little on my plate at work for the day, I would take a quick trip during lunch to get it out of the way. After a conversation with a coworker, it appeared that there was only one location in the area that offered "written tests" for licenses (Demotropolis Street). I took the 10 minute drive down the road, walked in, noticed a full room (but not a overly large number of people; around 40), took a number and had a seat. A few numbers were called and I realized that there were only two people working windows and there were not different lines. I was last in the line of 40 moving very slowly.
Two hours later, my number is actually called. Very thankful that I don't have a extremely strict lunch hour at work, I get out of my uncomfortable seat and stand in a line of eight other people who's number has just been called. It takes another 15 minutes to get to a window where a surprisingly pleasant older woman listens to my request and sets up a computer for me to take my motorcycle test.
Taking my test, it seems like the State of Alabama is more concerned about my not riding while intoxicated than my knowledge of motorcycle operation or laws. My first question asked about helmets, there were a few about road conditions and the last three were about drinking alcohol. Now that I think about it, maybe the DMV knows me better than it should. I thought there were going to be a lot of other questions, but the test abruptly ended. I suppose I had answered everything right and further questioning was unnecessary. I worked my way back to the window I had been at and pulled out my wallet to pay the dues for replacing my license.
Being the helpful woman she was, the lady at the window informs me that my license was a couple weeks away from needing to be renewed and that if I got a new license today, it would cost me a replacement fee and then a renewal fee within weeks. I decided to decline the immediate replacement and go to a more efficient DMV later. Finishing my business, I went back to work.
Trip 2: Fri 6/8 - I had received a notice in the mail that my truck tag needed renewing and I thought I could probably knock out two birds with one stone. This time I was going to be smart and go to the office just down from work. It was a newer building, with TV's and about 20 working windows. I got there early, was given a number and only waited about 10 minutes before I was called directly to a window. Taking care of my car tag was a breeze but when I mentioned needing to renew my drivers license, I was put back into line in the lobby. That turned out to be an equally short wait and I was back at a window. Unfortunately, I was quickly told I was ONE day too early trying to renew my license and there was no getting around it. She said that all I needed to do was come back Monday and it would be taken care of.
Trip 3: Mon 6/11 - I didn't get back to the DMV close to work as early as I had hoped, so I had about an hour and a half wait before I made it back to the same window I had stood at the previous Friday. A quick explanation of my previous visits and my purpose and I was informed that they would not be able to both renew my license and place the Motorcycle provision on the new license at that location. I would need to go back to Demotropolis. After a minute or two of unproductive arguments about what I had been told before, I left empty handed.
Trip 4: Tue 6/12 - I felt another long lunch trip would do the trick, so I left my office around 11:30 to get there ahead of any other people who might have the same idea. I didn't take into account that not all people in Mobile work for a living or they are smart enough to take a full day off for a DMV trip. I get there and the population is at least twice as large as trip one. There are no open, uncomfortable chairs. Standing room only. I ask the lady handing out tickets the approximate waiting time and she says, "about 3 hours" as she attempts to hand me a ticket. "HA, no thanks" is my only response as I walk back out the door.
Trip 5: Fri 6/16 - I took a few days off to cool down, b/c these failed attempts were really starting to eat away at me. Friday rolls around and I wake up at 5am, for two reasons. The first was that I wanted to try and catch an Australian Rules Football game live (started at 5:30) and I wanted to get to the Demotropolis location before it opened. Another coworker had mentioned that they had never had trouble getting a good spot in line when they showed up before 7am and that this was just when the DMV opened.
I was a little slow getting out of the house so I didn't make it to the building until around 7:05, and pulling up noticed there was a line outside the door. My hope was that the government employees were taking their sweet time opening the doors. My fear was that 7am was not actually the time they opened. I parked, took my place in line (about 20 people back) and started to chit-chat with those around me. It didn't seem at first that anyone knew the exact time that they opened. A minute or two passed and a guy walked up with the answer. 8am. That was enough for me. I was not going to wait an hour to get in the door before waiting another hour in a chair. I instead chose a 5 minute line in the Krystals down the street.
Trip 6: Later that day - I decided that I was just going to suck it up and sit in that building until I either accomplished my goal or died of starvation. So back I went for another lunch trip, waited another two hours for my number to be called and eventually made my way back to a window. Standing in line right before the window I thought to myself, 'What if by some work of satan, they have lost or deleted the data related to me passing my Motorcycle test, and that I am indeed stuck in a hellish cycle of DMV trips that never end. Getting to the window, I joked about the very same fact, and to my utter disappointment, the woman said, "yeah, I'm not actually seeing anything under your drivers license that says you took the test". I started laughing, partially thinking she's joking and partially because it was all I could do to not start weeping uncontrollably. I tried to keep my cool and explained to the woman that I had taken the test in that very building only a couple weeks ago and that there had to be some sort of record of it. She ended up looking up tests by date, found my results and then took my picture. To add some insult to injury, and due to what I believe was a loss of a piece of my soul during this whole process, my new drivers license makes me look like a Meth Addict.
Now that I have both the Vessel and Motorcycle provisions on my license, unless someday I decide to become a commercial driver, I should never need to go through this process ever again.
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