Our Wedding Day

The morning started out normal enough. I woke, showered and dressed. Jillian wrote out some timed instructions for me and then she was off early to get her hair done. I had an appointment with the tuxedo rental place at nine am. Being without a vehicle, my parents picked me up and we met Jillian's mother, Jenny, and her husband, Pat, by the shop across from a Best Western. Jenny stopped me at the door b/c Jillian's dress was there to get steamed and it had yet to be hidden. Pat was already being fitted when I made it inside. I don't remember the type of tux he chose. I'm sure it's in the pictures, but our job was to all get slightly different styles b/c Jillian's father was bringing his own and we didn't want him to be the odd man out during picture time. After Pat finished up and left, I was up. While getting measured, my dad fingered through the rack of camouflage tuxedos and asked if they had the blue and orange suites from the dumb & dumber movies and/or their matching top hats. They did, but thankfully mom was there to keep him in line.
After a bit, I ended up with the standard black and white version; a real vest and a fake bow tie b/c they didn't carry real ones. Dad was able to pull off getting an orange vest and bow tie that matched mom's dress. Tuxedos off the list, we headed a little deeper into downtown Gatlinburg to grab some breakfast.
Even though my list for the morning was short, I also didn't have a lot of time to spare and it so happened that nearly all restaurant lines were out of their respective doors. All apart from the Dunkin' Donuts. I thought I was in luck b/c the second item on my list was to get doughnuts from Krispy Kreme. The natural thought was, "I'll just buy doughnuts here. No one will be the wiser and I'll kill two birds with one stone." After a brief moment, I decided that going lone wolf on my wedding day was an unwise move and I texted my bride to be about the decision. In her opinion, there was enough of a drop off in quality between the two companies that she was forced to decline my proposition. This brought up an issue in that Krispy Kreme was in Pigeon Forge; a town on the other side of a few mountains.
Breakfast became a brief meal and we were on the road. An hour later, due to traffic, we picked up said doughnuts. While in the line though, I had a nice chat with a woman from Arizona who was on a rather long holiday, and had just driven in from North Carolina. Meanwhile, mom was down the street in a Cracker Barrel looking for Christmas gifts. I purchased 4 dozen doughnuts, rounded up the troops and we hopped back in the car... right after dad loudly farted in front of three outdoor tables. When he got in the car he said he couldn't even look at them in the eye as we drove by. He claims the volume and length of said flatulence was unexpected. We drove away quickly.
Embarrassment in the rear-view, we started making our way back to Gatlinburg. Right before our arrival in Pigeon Forge, Jillian had texted me with an additional request for a eighteen inch wooden "cookie"; which is essentially the stump slice used as a stand or tray on which to place our wedding cake. From past visits to Gatlinburg, I had learned a few back roads the locals use and we made our way down them in search of a wood works store. We made our winding way through a couple Arts & Craft villages until we were back on the main road that would eventually lead us back to the wedding site. The wedding planners had suggested a place called 'Heartwood Gallery' so I attempted to get Google directions on my phone. We ended up in someone's driveway and then in front of a liquor store.
Trying to get directions in a liquor store proved difficult so we just hopped back on the road and began stopping at every wood carving store that we noticed. The third one just so happened to be Heartwood. The owner was working on a very elaborate bathroom sink, meant to look like a vine covered tree trunk, when we walked into his shop. I quickly asked him if he could make me a 'cookie' twenty inches in diameter in the next couple hours and was surprised that he said "yes". I was even more amazed that it would only cost twenty-five dollars. We placed the order and my mother decided to pay for it along with some wooden Christmas ornaments she found while wandering his shop.

 Afterward, they ended up dropping me off at a cabin 'the guys' were staying at.
When I showed up, it was their wives that answered the door. Everyone else had left to go pick up BBQ for lunch. When they returned, we all had a few beers while the ladies left to get ready for the wedding and I was able to watch the first quarter of Auburn's game against Western Carolina.
I was supposed to be back at the wedding site at 3:30pm to help Jillian's brothers set up the exterior decorations.  So I had my dad pick me up at three, we swung by Heartwood to pick up the cookie and started up the mountain. To my surprise, we met her brothers going the opposite direction as we neared the top. They had decided to set things up early and were headed back to their cabins. Seeing as I didn't have any setup to do, I walked around the grounds making sure everything was set up properly; inside and out.

 After a few minutes, I noted to the wedding coordinators that the grass had still not been cut and they gave me some b.s. story about how they don't cut it short in the winter but that it had been cut that morning. My dad and I were both a little ticked off about that lie, but there was really nothing that could be done short of buying our own mower hours before the wedding. It was also around this time that I had to correct them on the placement of the edible leaves that were going on the wedding cake. Thank god I caught that one.

 Four o'clock rolled around and I had to walk up to our cabin to shower and change. Adding in a last minute shave, I was back out of the door around 4:45pm. Our cabin was about 100 yards away from the wedding site; all down hill. It was a bit of a surreal moment; walking down a road alone in your final moments as a single man. In a way, it felt like an appropriately symbolic end to a portion of my life's journey.
When I arrived at 5pm, Jillian had already returned from the salon and was 'holed up' in the bride's room, on-site, so she wouldn't be seen my myself or other guests. At least that was the intention. Apparently, there were more guests that visited her than she had hoped for and it got a little annoying.
As for myself, I was left alone with mine and Jillian's brothers. Without Jillian's direction, we were a little lost on what to do as guests arrived. It didn't help that the wedding planners were also nowhere to be found. Have I mentioned that they were terrible? Anyway, it took a few minutes to get our brother-ushers organized and seating people. At one point I asked her brother, Jarred, to ask her if my dad was supposed to hold both rings or just one. He appeared to be the camel back-breaking straw in the long line of visitors, b/c when he returned with the answer he also noted that he should probably be the last one to ask her any questions.

 Once the majority of guests were seated, things started falling into place. The wedding planners appeared, we walked our family members down the aisle and then Jillian made her entrance.
She was beautiful. Her long hair was up and to the side and she was glowing. Halfway down the aisle, she had to hold back tears; something neither one of us expected. The rest of the service itself is a blur. I remember a baby crying, a cell phone ringing and having to ask Kevin, our minister, to repeat a long section of my vows... because my memory is not great, even short term. I remember there being some laughs about that.
The reception that followed was less of a blur, but I remember more; like not being able to sit down and eat anything. We danced, cut cake and threw things at our friends. It was in keeping with all marital traditions. There were even some less traditional and unexpected treats. Our fathers gave speeches, even though we tried to avoid them by telling the DJ to not give people the microphone. My friends then gave short speeches before going into a well deserved revenge version of Adam's Mom (a play on Stacey's Mom by Fountains of Wayne). My brother, Andrew, who is usually not the most outgoing hit the dance floor and amazed the crowd with a solid version of the Gangnam Style dance.
It seemed like a very short period after the music had started and the food was gone that the majority of our older guests had departed. A little while later our family members were all but gone and it was just high school and college friends, so we turned the dj into a karaoke machine and let the mic roam the floor. It was a blast.
The night was supposed to end with everyone leaving; running off with leftover booze. I was pleasantly surprised that people actually stuck around and helped us clean up the reception hall. It was not necessary, but it's not out of character for the great friends that we have. Once clean, everyone found a sober spouse or friend and headed back to their respective cabins and Jillian and I made our short drive up to hours.