The End of an Era

Originally Posted: November 30, 2005

Current mood:content

Graduation seems to be sneaking up on me without me noticing. I wonder if it is some kind of internal defense mechanism that keeps me from worrying about the uncertainty of the future. I'm glad I have this feature or I would be going nuts. To leave my closest friends .. again... and venture into the world of perminance and redundancy. Work... come home... do mundane tasks... eat, sleep...(or go out drinking... hit on girls... go home... sleep). These things I try not to think about.

Gone soon will be the days of silliness. Going to playgrounds to play tag and pretend the ground is lava. Am I no longer allowed such behavior without having a child with me as an excuse? Can I still go rollling houses or stay up all night playing dominoes and drinking beer on the porch? Will I be able to sleep in on rainy mornings and go 3 days without showering just b/c I don't feel like it? Its a little unnerving. And what do I get in return for this lack of true freedom?!.... Money. It would be better if that was something I cared about. Yes... I need money for a home, food, and to pay for my bar tab... but it seems like I'm giving up so much more. I don't plan on changing my attitude towards life or the what I do... I just wonder if this transition to the real world will change me.
Its a depressing subject... but something I have to deal with. At least I will have weekends to visit people and afternoons in the sun to keep my inner child content