Hatred Released

Originally Posted: February 2, 2007

Current mood:bored

I have to vent about a couple things that have been bugging me for quite some time and I can't keep it in anymore. Here goes...

Nicolas Cage is not an action Hero!!! In fact I don't think Cage is even a decent actor. I believe it was middle school that i had a pair of adiddas that were falling apart... and I would make one of my shoes "talk" when I was bored by flopping the sole up and down and I'm pretty positive that my shoe was a more convincing actor.
When I think of an action hero, there are two defining characteristics one must have... at least as a male hero. 1) Intimidation Factor 2)Athleticism
Fact: Nicolas Cage is not intimidating!

This doesn't scream "fear me" as much as it does "feed me"... disgusting! and while your at the supermarket... try to find some hair cream... you're starting to receed.
Fact: Nicolas Cage runs like a fucking girl! After saying that.. I appologize to every girl on the planet for compairing your running to this pile of crap. I think everyone should pause for a moment, go rent National Treasure... fast forward to the part where he runs around... watch... laugh... and then eject the dvd... set it on fire... and find out how to destroy the memories of the crappy portion of a movie you just watched. Now can you name for me ONE good Nick Cage movie BECAUSE Nicolas Cage was in it... and I swear to God if you say Con Air, N.T. or Face Off ... I will find you and strangle you. National Treasure would have been good had the lead role been given to a can of tuna instead. Face off was atrocious and Con Air was a good movie only because of the rest of the cast. Steve Buscemi, John Malkovich, John Cusack, Dave Chapelle and Danny Trejo!!! If you made a film glorifying the life work of both Hitler and Stalin, and that was the supporting cast, Not only would it be a box office smash, I would stand in a line of smelly hippies to buy it when it came to DVD. By the way, if you thought, "Who is Danny Trejo?" you have just committed a crime against humanity... shame on you. The guy has been in nearly everything! The legend of Ron Burgendy would have just great instead of super great had he not been the bartender and said... Damn... you clean up good!... not to mention he totally saved 'Bubble Boy' from being a flop (ok.. that last one was sarcasm). Bottom Line... STOP PUTTING CAGE IN MOVIES!... I am even seriously considering not watching Ghost Rider which was one of my favorite comic book characters as a child... That is inhumane!

Another thing that bothers the shit out of me is men being total sissies and hyphenating their last name when they get married. GROW A PAIR! This is not a matriarchal society ladies... deal with it. 
"but thats so sexist!" ... no .. its simplistic and rational... but I know you don't understand that... b/c most women don't 'get' rational... or even simple.
Whats the easiest way to keep a consistant records of lineage? Well... last names in nations of European decent seemed to have worked for the last couple hundred years... how about we try not to throw in some multiple/expanded names into the mix. I want you to consider a few things. What you are proposing is that our children become walking historical indexes... every generation we tack on another 2 names and seperate them with a hyphen. GENIUS... way to think that one through chief! Lets give that 10-12 generations. I'd love to see your descendants last names when they are so long that even when you used the first letters of each name as an abbreviation for your name, writing the whole thing on paper destroys a forest. But I like the fact that it gives your parents and grandparents a warm fuzzy feeling inside b/c your lineage will live on... b/c God knows that genes are only passed down through your name. Sucks to be you. Maybe you should have thought about that when you had a daughter. You know in some countries its socially acceptable to drown them at birth. It's just a thought... and since you're obviously an idiot... maybe its better that you end your gene pool anyway.
Just to add one more thing to that... can you imagine how much more backed up the DMV would be JUST because we have to add extra shit to your childs drivers license. 
Thanks for ruining life on this planet asshole!
And that goes double for you Cage!