Originally Posted: November 29, 2008
Golf: (Noun) A sport intended to cause pain and anguish, instill a sense of humility as well as irrational optimism and create an unquenchable blood lusting hatred for all things nature in any and all persons attempting to play it.
I played golf with my Dad and Uncle this morning in Destin, Florida. The following thoughts went through my head today, just as they do every time I play golf:
1. " I should really put new grips on these clubs. My hands are starting to look like swiss cheese"
2. " I need to invest in sunscreen"
3. " Did I bring enough golf balls?"
4. " I wonder if someone will loan me some golf balls"
5. " Oh great, I left my pitching wedge on the last hole"
6. "I wonder if anyone else saw me only hit that ball 3 feet"
7. " I will NEVER be good at this game"
8. "I need to get a new fishing license"
9. "when is the beer cart girl coming around again?"
10. "Why did I wear slacks to a golf course just off the beach?"
11. "18 holes is way too many... what are we on? 16? Thank God... I will never play this game again"
12. Always on hole 18: "Man... those were some great shots. Maybe I should play next weekend"
On another note...
There may be a city ordinance that requires every Destin home within one mile of the beach to have an outdoor, screened in swimming pool. It is probably also recommended that you plant a lemon tree or two in your backyard. Next time you go there. Check it out... it's nuts. You live right by the beach and ALL of your neighbors have a swimming pool. Do you REALLY need your own?
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