Current mood:
enraged
Well, I have just woken up from yet another FANTASTIC night of partying with JD. I wake up to a aching head, upper left back pain and a swollen right hand.enraged"How did you manage that?" one might ask... well let me tell you.
Just around 8pm, Heather Maurer calls me and says.."where are you at? Daphne?! well come to callaghans!"
"ok.. will do"
Not off the phone for more than a second and i decide the night would be much more enjoyable if I invite JD.
(in true jd fashion) boom, DONE.
I shower, put on a fresh shirt and hit the door running. Callaghans is great. We drink for a couple hours and people show up and then most leave. It ends up being myself, JD, Heather and Mary still hanging around, so we all take off for Downtown. First stop... 'Red's' b/c its laid back as shit. Reds was just as expected.... but filled with lesbians... and not the cool lesbians you see on tv that look like supermodels and there is a hint of heterosexuality and the possibility of you going home and porkin both of 'em... we're talkin' mullets with flannel shirts (sleeves removed) and about 200 extra pounds of lovin' per person. Mary and Heather didn't feel quite comfortable there so after a beer or two we left and went down to grand central.
Grand Central started off slow, but the girls and I got the dancefloor hoppin' (literally... it was a heavy metal band)
Dancing lasted for a while and when we were all good and D-runk we went upstairs.(b/c thats where the girl that had been hanging all over me and JD was.. hey.. i'll be honesty... head #1 wasn't doing much of the thinking last night) Heather at this point was wasted and was carried downstairs and out the door. Good ol' Heather; a true champion amongst women. Mary was a saint and took off with her in search of a bed.
ANYWAY... back Inside I continue to hit on the girl who was hanging on us, even though she smoked. Under normal circumstances that is a complete turn-off. Her friends decided to call it a night and took her with them... but not before I wrote my name and number on her hand and all the way up her arm..... lol. side note: I listen to my messages when I get home that night and hear her say "hey Adam.. this is Courtney... (edited for content)... you should call me" SHIT.. I missed a good call!
Back to the story. JD and I closed out our tabs in grand central (my nightly total:$57... not bad AT ALL) and went back to red's... why not. Drunk + Lesbians = ... um... entertaining i guess. We ended up running into Crystal and her "sister Paprica" and shot the shit with them for a good hour. I got to play drunk ping pong with the both of them. That was memorable I guess. Red's had last call at 2am, so that's when we left. The planned destination: Nick and JD's house. Point of arrival: Boo Radley's...3 buildings down. Another round of beers and it was time to leave. On the walk to the car.. we started chatting about getting some "fucking waffle house", which was a great idea. After JD finished chatting with random people in the street corner hot dog vendor line, we ran into some punk ass highschool kid. He had to be in highschool or was just a very young looking 21 year old. About 5'6" 120lbs soaking wet. The guy was walking with 2 girls (one I assume was his GF the other his sister) and had his shirt off. Just being the friendly fun-loving guy that JD is... he says "who took that sexy mans shirt" which makes the girls smile and should have gotten a laugh out of the guy as well.. but he obviously has homophobic issues that he needs to resolve or perhaps his dad touched him when he was little or something. who knows. With a second comment ... something to the effect 'well you are just too cute... someone needs to find this man a shirt' .. homeboy got confrontational. "keep playin bitch"... usually this would cause warning signs to pop up in our heads. Perhaps thats enough. But this guy was small in stature and very drunk, so it rolled off us. For the two of us, this was goofing off... we weren't even trying to get him pissed. For about a block he kept on about how he would beat our asses, which unfortunately got me laughing. Guy was steaming at this point, and wouldnt shut his drunk trap.
We walked silently for a bit behind them b/c our car was in the same lot. We got to my truck and they got to theirs.. and this mother fucker was still yelling shit at us. We both in a half-ass apologetic tone told him that we were just messing around and he should just chill, but homeboy was a little too high strung. We get in the truck and I start to back out of my spot. As I'm backing up, I roll my window down so I can get some air... b/c as humorous as his comments were initially, they started to get to me. We nearly get out of the parking lot and JD leans across me in the direction of their vehicle and says... "man I'd like a peice of you're little girlfriend" . As I turn to look at JD and say "really?!" , that NUTSACK runs up and punches out my back window then grabs my throat through the window. BIG FUCKING MISTAKE FRIEND.
This portion is blurred b/c of adrenaline... but JD helped me peice most of it together. I remember throwing the truck into park.. saying "you are fucking dead" and being outside in less than 2 seconds. This guy has never seen an ass wooping as bad as I gave him.... AND THEN JD joined in. We pummeled that little bitch. Apparently his girlfriend found a shuvel and hit me in the back with it (the reason my back hurts this morning)... and JD quickly put and end to her nonsense with a jab to the nose. Whilest I was going to town on this little shit's head, his "sister" was punching and slapping the shit out of mine. I do remember that but don't feel it this morning. I don't know how he was able to get up. I think the girls tore him from my death grip and that little shit started running while he was threatening me. (I wish people could see my hands as I recall this ... still makes them shake). This guy ends up jumping in the car and leaving the two girls outside to fend for him. I'm not going to hit a girl so I immediately get on the phone and call the cops (I do this because all I can think about is getting insurance money for my window... not thinking that I could definitely be going to jail for being slightly intoxicated and beating the shit out of some little guy.) While I do this... JD uses the recently acquire shuvel to bust out 3 of his windows while they try to leave... then he nearly rips off their license plate before they speed off. The cops show up and we give a description of their vehicle... a couple cops drive off to (i assume) look for them. Officer Estus was nice enough to stick around and listen to us make empty threats about what we would do if he came back... while he filled out the paperwork on my broken window. He took off and a little later we left.... End o Night
So... In all a great night. I hung out with ALOT of hot girls... I danced and got drunk... got a great voice message and beat some dudes ass. Downside... I lost a truck window...
Tune in next weekend for another great story
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